How My Journey with the Mother Wound Began
In 2013, I came home from a women’s conference frustrated by what I saw as a lack of depth in how we talk about women’s issues. Spurred by a deep desire to explain in detail the deeper, internal cause of many of the struggles we face, I penned an essay called “Why it’s Crucial for Women to Heal the Mother Wound.” I woke up the next morning to see it had been shared thousands times in a matter of hours, sparking a new awareness about the Mother Wound around the world. Since 2013, I have published dozens of articles and have been interviewed on many podcasts and media outlets. Most recently I have written a book that teaches women how to discover our inner mother as a source of wisdom and power within us and how to cultivate a lifelong practice of “inner mothering,” that constantly opens us up to ever-deeper levels of healing and unapologetic self-ownership. My book will be published by William Morrow in the Spring of 2020.
Here’s some of what I’ve learned along the way:
- Whether you accept it or not, your relationship with your mother has been one of the most significant forces shaping your life.
- The Mother Wound is something that is passed down from mothers to daughters, to some degree, and is partly a result of the toxic cultural atmosphere that devalues women as a whole.
- Each of us has our mother’s voice in our heads, the tone of which may range from supportive to harmful, wielding a subtle yet powerful influence over our lives as women.
- Healing the Mother Wound requires transforming the inner mother from a duplicate of our outer mother, who has shortcomings to some degree, to an inner mother who can abundantly meet our needs and provide the inner safety we need to grow into our full potential.
- As we feel increasingly safer and supported from within, we become more capable of moving beyond our inherited “maternal horizon” and into greater levels of fulfillment, joy, belonging, innovation and success.
- There is no final “done” moment of healing. Nor is healing separate from daily life. Rather, healing and transformation become a way of life. Everyday triggers are opportunities to heal your past and make new choices, opening up new possibilities for your future.
- Taking the time to heal your Mother Wound is the most important personal development work you’ll ever do. It heals not only yourself but clears the way for future generations and transforms society as a whole.
The Evolution of My Work
I have a Master’s degree in psychology as well as twenty-two years as a client in long-term depth psychotherapy, which I continue to do this day. Anti-racism work is central to my path personally and professionally. I’ve completed training in Life Coaching from Joanna Lindenbaum and Holistic MBA. Prior to coaching, as a graduate student I focused on social psychology research on the intersection of race, class and gender. Post-grad school, I worked in academia in the area of research ethics and also as a writer/editor at Weill Cornell Medical Center in New York City.
I started a blog in 2013 that was focused on defining the “Mother Wound” and explaining its key role in women’s empowerment. Although work by writers such as Adrienne Rich and Christiane Northrup has touched on the Mother Wound, no one had yet fleshed out exactly what the Mother Wound is and why it remains a universal experience of women the world over. My work addresses a crucial gap in our understanding of women’s psychology and empowerment by comprehensively defining the Mother Wound and how it manifests in women’s lives.
I teach a 7-step “roadmap” for how to navigate the process of healing the Mother Wound through cultivating a relationship with an Inner Mother. I teach this process in three different formats: an online course, workshops, and a mentorship program for female leaders & entrepreneurs. Through blending cutting-edge research on intergenerational trauma, feminist theory, and psychology with my own personal story, my work is the result of decades of research and my personal journey of healing.
Through the years and my research, my influences have come from the work of Audre Lorde, Marion Woodman, James Hollis, Gabor Maté, Adrienne Rich, Eve Ensler, Rachel Cargle, Rebecca Solnit, Rachel Ricketts, bell hooks, Jeannie Zandi, John Bradshaw, Peter Levine, Adyashanti and many more.