How to Use Your Attention to Embody a Higher Quality of Life in 2023

Welcome to the New Year!
Your attention is one of your greatest resources.
A huge part of being a sovereign woman is CONSCIOUSLY CHOOSING what and where we put our attention.
This requires us to reflect and consider:
- What tasks and people feel draining to me?
- How am I numbing out or allowing myself to get distracted?
- How is that distraction pulling me from what really matters?
- What are the most essential things right now in my life?
- What can I let go of to create more time and space to just BE?
- What is actually most important to me right now?
- What gives me energy, fulfillment, and joy?
These days, many institutions and corporations profit off of our lack of awareness around where we put out time and attention. The more ungrounded, fearful, and divisive we are, the more our thinking can be further manipulated and controlled.
On a personal and collective level, it’s more important than ever to become aware and *at choice* around what we are giving our precious attention towards because whatever we focus upon, expands. We can choose differently!
This isn’t about denial or spiritual bypassing, but about being BOTH aware of the chaos and devastation happening around the world, AND holding a personal commitment to remaining centered, compassionate, present, and in integrity, as much as we can in order to…
- Hear the still small voice within so that we can discern what is right and best for us
- Model a new way of being that holds a vision of care and compassion for all beings
- Authentically hold space for others when we have the energy
- Be aware of our limits and listen to them
- Refuse to over-function or deplete ourselves
- Set boundaries with compassion
- Say no with clarity and kindness
- Turn lovingly towards our own pain and grief
- Have patience with our own organic process
- Have the courage to be vulnerable and real without shame
- Tenderly embody and hold more of what we want to see in the world
This is a major opportunity to hold the energy we want to see in the world, to be sovereign, meaning to be “internally-oriented” rather than “externally-oriented.”
The world is like a mirror.
For many of us who are trauma survivors, we may look around and see “patriarchal dysfunction on steroids,” the kind of dysfunction and lack of awareness that we grew up with inside our families of origin. It can be very triggering and disorienting. It may bring to mind how, as little girls, we had no choice but to be externally-oriented, to try to be what the outside world told us we had to be in order to be loved and approved of. Many of those dynamics taught us to self-abandon, silence our truth, and feel shame about normal human needs and feelings. Many people around us are still stuck there right now and playing out lots of painful, unconscious patterns.
It’s important not to get pulled back into those toxic dynamics and power-plays. We can choose differently than others without condemning them or shaming ourselves. This is our time to allow and create a higher quality of life for ourselves. Much of this comes down to saying NO to distractions and energy-draining people and activities.
I’m calling out to you, especially those of you who have been on an intense, sincere path of growth and transformation for some time:
It’s time for us to radiate fierce self-love and compassion WHILE ALSO decidedly turning away from things, people, activities that drain us and distract us from what is most important and essential in our lives.
Sacred Refusals and Sovereignty
I call these “Sacred Refusals;” to say No without shame or guilt, but rather out of deep self-love and self-respect.
This is not so easy for those of us who have been groomed from birth to be people-pleasers and emotional caretakers. Nonetheless, there comes a time when we see that this is the way forward and requires letting other people have their own lessons, their own struggles, and respecting their process and timelines as valid.
This is the energy of sovereignty, it’s a courageous YES to LIFE in the fullest sense, to the deeper, ultimate goodness of life below the current situations and challenges. And it’s saying an unapologetic NO to things, people, and activities that drain and suck your energy. This liberates you AND others.
No one can make this choice for us. Only we can make that conscious choice to focus our attention on what really matters, each and every day.
The great news? With this growing awareness, life gets much more simple, more grounded, more fulfilling, more joyful!
As you become more sovereign, more “internally-oriented” your day may be less cluttered, your friend group may become smaller, your time on the internet may be fewer hours, you may see your family less often, but what you get in return is a higher quality of life. More mental space to reflect, to be creative, to JUST BE, more restful sleep, more mental calmness, and spaciousness, just to name a few.
I believe that in 2023, the energy is: “Let it go”, “Less is more” and “Create space”.
Pruning is essential to embodying a higher quality of life
Like a plant, those of us who are ready, are being pruned way down to the most essential, so we can soon harvest more lusciously that which truly nourishes us: our deepest truth, our own presence, the love, harmony, and joy of simply being, and feeling that inter-being with all life. This is true nourishment, deeper than any of the empty patriarchal promises of consumerism and power-plays we see playing out around us. Our sovereign energy benefits those around us as well. This is a win-win!
We’re in the middle of a major time on the earth and being rooted in our truth, sovereignty, and compassion, letting go of what does not serve, is a powerful way to make a powerful energetic contribution to the whole.
Want to read more about becoming more sovereign? Check out this article.
I wish this to be your most SOVEREIGN year yet, and I’m so excited to support you in 2023 in creating that!
All my love,
Bethany
P.S. If you are ready to heal the Mother Wound you can buy my book or enroll in my best-selling online course here.

Photo by Moritz Knöringer on Unsplash